I'm emotionally drained. I was told this week that I can't have the midwives deliver my baby. Luckily we've worked that out. All these policies are driving me crazy. The midwives will be there with me and the doctors will be managing the birth. I hate this.
I found out today that baby has decided to turn breech. I'm going to be trying everything this week to get him to turn (I have two weeks). It just seems like it's one bad news after another. They talked about starting me next week if he's head down and doing this, that, and the other thing . I want to wait until the week after that to make sure baby is ready. They can't try and turn the baby because of the anticoagulants. I'm not sure how much more I can take and what I'm supposed to learn from all this. I can't wait until it's all over. I just don't know what is going to happen. It seems like all is going against everything I want. I feel out of control and my choices are being taken away one at a time. Bring it on.....why not.
I start Heparin tomorrow and then in for yet another blood test to see how I'm handling it. My head hurts and I'm so tired and I'm sick of it all. I never want to see another needle again.
Okay, it's all out. Whaaaaaa!! I guess I need to stop wining and get to work hanging upside down....turn baby, turn.
2 comments:
Oh Mary, you may feel like everything is out of your control, but just remember who's control it's in.
I know how you feel about doing things as naturally as possible, but modern medicine just might be the only thing to help you and your baby. I don't mean to preach to you. You've gotten me to change my way of thinking when it comes to health (not that you intended to). Just try to keep an open mind about this, just like you'd like people to keep an open mind when you talk to them about food and health.
I think you're great. I'm sure everything will be fine with your little one. You are in my prayers and will continue to be.
I'm praying for you, Mary.
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